PARTICLES to WAVES

That was a damn tough year. I’m trying to think of the parts that weren’t tough, and to understand that the hard parts helped me grow and learn. I wrote poems, not many, but more than I wrote the past few years. I cooked a lot and made up new recipes, and tried others’ recipes. I tried to feed people well. I kept myself healthy with 3, 147 miles on my bike and spin bike and trainer. I rode my longest ride to date at just over 50 miles, and it wasn’t nearly as difficult as I thought it might be. I calmed and strengthened myself with hours of Pilates. I donated my time and heart and energy to help people. I dealt with lots of difficulty and learned more and more about how to cope – and to take care of myself better while trying to improve a negative situation. I painted a little. I took photos. I traveled to some places I hadn’t traveled to before, and spent an afternoon wading in a mountain stream. I met a rock star while she was DJing. I saw (and heard) loads of music shows. And with help and on my own I found extraordinary music to listen to anytime to enhance living. I read more books this year than I did the past year or so, including Buddhism-related books – new territory that also feels like it’s been inside me all along – for which I’m deeply grateful. And I’m thankful for all the poetry manuscripts I read and loved that hopefully will be published someday. These books helped me charge my brain which helps me charge the rest of everything. I researched new topics. I debated (sometimes peacefully). I tried to listen and understand. I met new friends and got back in touch with older friends. I cried almost every day; but that means I care intensely and feel to the point it’s near unbearable. I also laughed and breathed deeply and I sweat and smiled and focused and planned and remembered and I hoped. I took care of a furry, zany creature who when lost found me to live with; and I giggled and snuggled with him and was thankful every day for his companionship. The best parts of the year were basic just like that. The tough parts made the better parts glow in gratitude. I’m hopeful the warmer moments of 2017 will be more in number and less hard-fought so I can work harder to find my purpose. I hope I help others to be happy; I don’t even need to know if I do but I hope I help any joy I earn grow from the roots and spread in the world like spring-vibrant ground cover. I hope we all suffer less and thrive more. I hope we create peace. Happy New Year, 2017.